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| so close, yet so far.
why am i so worried about all the extra ribbons i could get when it dont matter in the real world?
supposedly getting a PUC from last pump, nato with insignia for this one as well as another PUC.
chasing the gold star for my CAR... i know my life isnt worth a 40 cent ribbon, but why do i keep fighting for it?
who do i have to impress out here, but myself?
why am i trying to make a name for myself?
i really should call it quits and play it safe.
really.
in other worldly news, i need to sell my whip.
funding for a whole new ride.
tell others to consider buying my car!
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| deployment update: its not too bad.
it could be worse.
out here gives me alot of time to think in the sun.
and work out somewhat.
except there is nothing to work out with.
hah.
yeah.
cant wait to go home.
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| an epic battle.
indeed.
i stay standing.
you sir, are smashed by my slippers of the pilgrimage haji.
them fuckers are fast.
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| a couple hours from staging gear at the annex.
ADDRESS:
***estimated delivery time: 2.5 months***
CPL REYES EDGAR D
2ND BN 3RD MAR FOX CO
UNIT 44045 FPO AP 96607-4055
on another side of the box, or on every other side of the box, please write:
"SEND TO GOLESTAN" in big letters...
theyve been having trouble with mail going to its correct place.
this will settle the problem.
this is the third time.
this is it.
chapter three: afghanistan.
i really dont know how to react.
what to feel anymore.
is there any sorrow for those against me.
is there any mercy for those shooting at me.
is there any guilt for pulling the trigger.
or maybe its pleasure...?
am i fucked up in the head or is the numerous amount of deployments finally sinking in.
im with a new squad of guys.
some trustworthy, others are full of idiocracy and stupidity.
all in all, ready for it.
like ive said twice before.
ready for war; not ready to die.
god, youve let me go this far.
i cant blame you if its my time, but if it is, please watch over my family and my woman.
so many incidents that happened; lucked out, escaped death.
this deployment just doesnt feel right.
3/8 will be relieved by us, so yeah.
please dont let this be another haditha or worse... or worst.
im trying my best to come home alive and in one piece.
it took me two deployments to realize, my life is not worth any ribbon(s), so why am i still chasing valor?
dont sweat it, guyguy.
one more pump.
after this is done, ill be home for good.
resting peacely or breathing.
hopefully breathing.
ill goto school.
live my life, finally be home with my one and only.
maybe get another 240 for a daily driver, who knows.
help my parents so they can retire early.
start my family.
and spend time with my family as i missed those times so much.
so close to being home i can taste the fried cheesecake right now.
i can imagine taking my girl to work.
i can feel my car pulling so far away from a twin turbo corvette.
motivation.
believe it or not.
prior to deploying, i was sent to a psyche in order of mental health and help.
they say that i may be crazy.
am i?
or am i just too blunt and sarcastic with a very serious face and a loud deep voice of authority.
is this what the corps did to me?
i dont think so, i think the psyche is a "fucking idiot", like i stated in which he wrote down,
me: hey doc, can i ask you something about you, personally?
doctor: sure edgar, what is on your mind?
me: youre a fucking idiot, did anyone ever tell you that?
*discrete and long, silent pause while i am staring at him directly looking into his eyes*
doctor: that wasnt a question, edgar...
me: *louder voice*HOLY SHIT THIS IS STUPID CAN I GO NOW?!
lol, good times.
i know what im doing, im just extra careful of everything.
i like to plan ahead.
and plan for success.
be ahead of the game.
from being in the marine corps, did they shape me into wanting to be a perfectionist?
why do i always netpick things out thats wrong.
i wonder how my life will be when i get out, probably glorious.
but just thinking about it.
we're still at war no matter where it is.
and we're always fighting.
the wars that have been going on far before i was a sperm swimming in a ballsack and will continue on after my bones have turned into dust.
at least i know why we are fighting it.
if only the not so smart side of america could understand it.
once again, lord, thank you for everything youve helped me do and get so far.
please watch over me and my marines as we goto this not so friendly environment.
please dont abandon me out there lord, ive talked to you daily, so hopefully you can consider me as your friend and loyal follower.
again everyone, friends, family, my one and only, thank you for everything.
i dont know what i would do without you guys. (and girls)
if i go out fighting, dont forget my name or who i was...
lord help us all.
(who are deploying)
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| once again, thank you lord, my leave got approved.
taking five days home, if anyones down to kick it, you know how to contact me.
for those who havent been following, i will be going out again.
recap.
chapter one: haditha triad, city and dam.
chapter two: fallujah, karma ip station.
introduction to chapter three: afghanistan
where?
eastern AO.
when?
end of april.
who?
fox company.
i will be going to the up northern mountainous area, where snipers like to practice shooting us.
they speak a different dialect, and now its left instead of right hand.
no internet.
no phone.
no running water.
no stable power source.
means no good for me.
im debating whether i should take my toshiba laptop.
i bought a bootleg acer aspire one which ended up being pretty handy.
in accordance with the laptop, i bought alot of shit for it as well:
- extended batteries
- screen protector
- keyboard protector
- hardcase
- external chargers
downloading as much music, tv shows and movies as i can right now.
i just got done taking my flak apart, cleaning it and putting it back together.
as well as rearranging whats important and where it goes.
im being upgraded!
M16<M4+203 & M9 WOO!
good for me, bad for whoevers gonna be in charge of me and whoever im going up against, im quick at the trigger.
the new guys arent that great, but at least theyre learning.
the one pumpers are gonna see how a real deployment goes.
the haditha marines (two pumpers) arent feeling right about this one.
the al jalalabad marines (three pumpers) are saying we're fucked.
lets see how my life long goal list is going...
- finish highschool
- join the marine corps
- shoot people and get paid for it by the government
- scuba dive
- sky dive
- goto the philippines
- survive iraq
- survive iraq again
- get my dream car
- get my dream girl
things i need to accomplish...
- blow an afghani up with a 203
- hit sergeant
- survive afghanistan
- have a lambo killing 240
- have 20 kids
- own a house
- own my own businesses
four years.
can you believe it?
right around the corner.
everyones having kids.
all my little cousins are graduating.
holy matt damon, im getting old.
My name is:: guyguy
I am:: 22
Right now, I feel:: excited to go home.
The sounds I hear are:: my fan and my music.
Around me, I see:: all my shit in the room.
I feel most connected to this person:: jesus.
I think it..'s weird that:: ive become very fond of zebra cakes.
It bothers me when:: people dont listen or dont follow through.
The best thing about my personality is:: i tell it how it is.
My worst quality is:: i tell it how it is.
My favorite part about life is:: family.
This is attractive in the opposite sex:: smile.
Sometimes, I wonder about:: reenlisting.
I usually get bored while:: SOG COG or GUARD
I'm afraid that:: my marines wont make it back home alive
If someone hates me, I:: make it worse and make fun of them in front of everyone and wont shut up hoping hed do something so i can have a legitimate reason to fuck him up.
I admire:: courage and knowledge.
I wish:: i could go back home for good and live happily ever after with my woman.
I feel exhilarated when:: i take a big shit.
I appreciate:: pillows, beds, air condition, hot food, running water and toiletry.
I'll never get over:: games and the piano.
The best thing to happen this week was:: landing in kbay and taking leave tomorrow.
I feel fat after:: i eat something greasy.
If I could tell the world just one thing, it would be:: KILL BABIES
Some people are just so:: idiotic.
I'm optimistic about:: the worst case scenarios; "it can always be worse"
An event like this would traumatize me:: THAT WASNT ANY ORDINARY CONTRACT, THAT WAS YOUR 4 YEAR REENLISTMENT! *NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*
I'm jealous of:: faster cars.
I trust:: very few.
My intuition is usually:: about how i can manage time and how i can make everything happen in a certain amount of time.
One time, I spontaneously:: danced the macarena in a jack in the box for free buttermilks, it was so worth it.
I haven't had this feeling in a long time:: fear.
I am proud of:: myself for making it this far.
I would never be seen wearing:: army cammies.
The scariest dream I ever had was:: jack in the box closing! oh the horror!
I am annoyed because:: youre gay.
I feel most beautiful when:: im in my blues with my new stack!
I could careless about:: gas prices.
My favorite kind of movie is:: COMEDY! I LOVE TO LAUGH! I LAUGH TO KILL! i dont love killing?
I often get distracted by:: very sexy 240s.
I am eager to:: get alot of shit done to my 240.
I'm glad that:: tay is a genius.
I feel guilty about:: being alive for this long.
This really hurts:: my right knuckles.
I've finally made peace with the fact that:: im going to afghanistan for sure.
I'm most talkative around:: anyone and everyone, doesnt matter what the situation is.
I was so embarrassed when:: i was in anger management until i realized how gay it was then i made best of the situation and overexaggerated everything to make the lady mad every other day.
One feeling I hate is:: when youre on a patrol and they call a halt because of some small interruption like a sheep herder passing through, and youre on the outer dispersion of the patrol in the middle of the road with no cover but all you can do is kneel and pray no one is aiming at you.
One feeling I love is:: touching down from a deployment, knowing you made it home safe.
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